Thanksgiving, Custody & Conflict: How to Avoid Holiday Drama When Co-Parenting in Maryland
Thanksgiving is meant to be a time of connection, gratitude, and family. But for co-parents in Maryland, the holiday can become a battleground. Disagreements over who gets the kids—and when—can turn what should be a joyful season into a stress-filled struggle.
If you share custody of your child, this blog is for you. We’ll walk through the legal and practical steps to navigating Thanksgiving peacefully and protecting what matters most—your child’s well-being.
Why Holidays Are So Difficult for Co-Parents
The holidays are emotionally charged. Everyone wants to be with their child. Traditions matter. And when families no longer live under the same roof, dividing holiday time can feel deeply unfair.
In Maryland, many custody agreements include a specific holiday schedule. If yours doesn’t—or if the terms are unclear—now is the time to clarify expectations.
Step 1: Know Your Legal Agreement
Start by reviewing your custody order or parenting plan. Common structures include:
- Alternating holidays each year
- Splitting the day (e.g., one parent has the morning, the other the evening)
- Assigning Thanksgiving to one parent and Christmas to the other, then rotating annually
If your agreement lacks a clear holiday provision, informal arrangements should be put in writing via text or email to prevent future misunderstandings.
Step 2: Open the Lines of Communication
Approach the conversation early—preferably by the start of November. Discuss:
- Drop-off/pick-up times
- Travel plans
- Meal times and extended family visits
- Any potential scheduling conflicts
Use neutral language and avoid blaming or shaming. If you’re having difficulty, consider using co-parenting apps like OurFamilyWizard or Talking Parents to keep communications civil and trackable.
Step 3: Keep Your Child at the Center
Remember: the holiday is about your child’s experience, not yours. Children pick up on tension and conflict easily. Avoid:
- Arguing in front of the child
- Forcing them to choose where they want to go
- Bad-mouthing the other parent or extended family
Your child deserves to enjoy Thanksgiving without guilt or pressure.
Step 4: Be Willing to Compromise
Sometimes things don’t go as planned. Be flexible when possible—especially if your co-parent is willing to trade time for another holiday or a long weekend.
Courts in Maryland appreciate co-parents who show flexibility, reasonableness, and prioritize their child's needs.
When Things Break Down
If your co-parent refuses to follow the agreed schedule, keeps your child beyond their time, or uses the holiday to exert control, you may need legal help.
You have options:
- File a petition to enforce the custody order
- Seek a modification if the current plan no longer serves the child’s best interests
- Document incidents in writing (including missed exchanges and communication)
How a Maryland Family Law Attorney Can Help
We can:
- Review or draft holiday custody provisions
- Mediate disputes before court becomes necessary
- File motions to enforce or modify custody
- Represent you in court with the child’s best interests in mind
Maryland Family Lawyers
As you navigate the intricacies of Maryland family law and holiday scheduling, consider the family law experts at Albers & Associates for guidance. Based in Westminster, MD, our skilled attorneys are adept at mediating disputes and assisting with custody modifications tailored to your family's unique needs. Contact us today at (443) 665-8030 to ensure a holiday season that meets your legal standards and supports your family's well-being.